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TRAUMA

"YOUR TRAUMA IS NOURISHED BY YOUR REFUSAL TO ACKNOWLEDGE IT, AND STARVED BY YOUR ATTEMPTS TO UNDERSTAND IT." - Conner Furu


Trauma.


Forgive me if you're the sole individual on the planet who hasn't

endured Trauma's, at times, seemingly inescapable grasp. If you

are that person, feel free to stop reading. This one isn't for you.


We are all guilty of harboring our demons. I'll take it a step

further. I would argue that we have a natural propensity to not

only harbor them, but to allow them to live lavishly amongst all

the other parts of our psyche. We treat them to four course meals,

Egyptian cotton sheets, and every other comfortable amenity that

our minds could possibly conceive in hopes it will keep them silent.

If you treated yourself half as well as you treat your trauma you

wouldn't be thinking about whatever past pain and heartache my

last few sentences just projected in your mind. If nothing was

provoked then congratulations. Perhaps you are well on your way

to understanding yourself better than 99.99% of the population.


As someone who spent years of life harboring demons I claimed to

have beat, I am here to tell you that you haven't and never fully

will.


It is a dangerous belief to hold that you have totally overcome your

past demons. By doing so you create the most fertile environment

for them to flourish. You give them complete autonomy to run

rampant in your unconscious and by doing so give them the ability

to cause the most damage. Have you ever heard someone say they

are a "recovered" alcoholic or addict? No. You will only find addicts

who are in "recovery". Whether their sobriety has lasted a day or a

decade, they forever will be a "recovering addict". The second they

believe they are above that demon is the second they are most

vulnerable to return beneath it.


Rather than facing our demons many of us choose to bribe them.

Taking an "out of sight and out of mind approach." In hopes that

by not confronting them and giving them a comfortable spot deep

within our conscience, this will keep them quiet. It almost feels

comparable to a movie where someone is paid off to keep quiet

about a crime only to snitch on the person who paid them off. Now

they are in jail and the snitch has their money. Moral of the story...


Don't make deals with your demons.



Running away from your demons has not, will not, and will never

beat them. It will simply make you too tired to fight once they

finally catch up.


I believe when payed close enough attention to, nature provides the

clearest insight into our own lives. One of the greatest metaphors I

have came across for life relates to bison and how they approach

an incoming storm. There are a few options for the bison. The

first being the tactic that most of people utilize. Run away. This

not only does not stop or weaken the storm, it simply strips you of

your strength to weather the storm once it finally rolls overhead.


Secondly, your option would be to shelter in place and hope the

storm is mild enough to endure. This is arguably a better tactic

than the first, except choosing this strategy leaves you at the

mercy of the storm. It can throw and beat you which ever way it

sees fit. Although this strategy may deceive you into thinking you

have formidable survival skills, in actuality it simply leaves you

unequipped to fight against future storms that are of any greater

magnitude.


Lastly, is to turn towards it. Walk straight into it. Face it. Most

often in our lives the storm looms over the path of which we least

want to travel, which ironically leads to the destination we most

want to go.


In the case of the bison they know that by utilizing the strength

and speed of the incoming storm against itself, combined with

their strength and endurance going in the opposing direction that

not only will they get through the storm sooner, the bison will find

itself more formidable and well equipped on the other side. Not

only because it increased its understanding of it's own capabilities,

but also it's understanding of the storm itself. You won't see them

flinch in the presence of adversity and future "storms" because

they know what lies ahead and understand their capacity to

endure it.


There is another benefit to "facing the storm". Doing so makes you

a gift to those who make up the world around you. Strong bison

produce strong bison. Same with us. By bearing your suffering

nobly, you unconsciously provide an example of strength to the

world around you by simply refusing to crumble under the current

weight you are bearing.


Many times the trials you face are not solely for your own

personal growth. There are times they can be designed for the

growth of others. Designed to provide an example of strength to

someone in need. Designed to allow for someone to harness the

courage from within they previously didn't know they had...


To show someone they are not alone.


If there is anything you get out of the words you are reading I

hope it is that you should never underestimate the significance

of overcoming your hardships. You may not have been the only

one to grow from them.


By choosing to walk into "the storm" and coming out on the

other side, you not only become more formidable yourself but

you might just turn around and realize that you unknowingly

have been leading others out the whole time.



 

"What you resist, persists." - Carl Jung

 

What trauma have you allowed to go unaddressed? Swept under

the rug?


Let me rephrase.


What trauma have you been running from up to this point that

has caused the world and those close to you to be deprived of the

version of you that willingly chose to face your storm?

Whatever your storm may be. Physical or emotional abuse,

childhood trauma, your health, loss of a loved one, or any of the

infinite inevitabilities life has in it's arsenal. I hope you decide to

turn into it and face it. Because the world needs that version of

you.


There is much more to you than even you can possibly conceive.

and for your sake I hope you get to meet that version of you that

turned into the storm.


Selfishly, I'd like to meet that person too.

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