"YOUR WILLINGNESS TO PLACE A PRICE TAG ON YOUR PEACE MEANS IT HAS ALREADY BEEN SOLD." - Conner Furu
What I have noticed over the first three issues of this newsletter is
a moderate apprehension to address some of the topics I have
written.
This is not because I am worried about the newsletter not
accomplishing its goal, but rather I believe it has been and will
continue to do its job in forcing honest reflection onto those who
read the words, as well as the man that writes them. I, myself have
found myself reflecting on the words I write and see that although
I believe my words to be true, I still may fall short from time to
time in my ability to live up to the standard I hold myself to. In the
pursuit of encouraging others to reflect upon their lives it makes
me constantly reflect upon my own. It forces me to audit myself.
Where am I successful? Where am I deficient? Have I been a good
friend? Have I been making my physical/mental health a priority?
There are two traits you must look for in a question:
1. Does this question make me uncomfortable?
2. Does this question force me to be honest?
Discomfort and honesty are the two most crucial traits of a
question when in the pursuit of growth. Unfortunately, the
combination of these two traits are a formula for the most difficult
questions that most of us don't want to ask ourselves.
My apprehension comes from the reality that I know some of the
things I write may be difficult for some to hear and come to terms
with which is why I know I must write them.
At some point or another you were asked as a young child what
you wanted to be when you grow up. Common answers being
athlete, astronaut, rockstar, anything that set our hearts on fire
whenever the thought came across our mind, watched our favorite
player catch a touchdown pass, or sang our favorite song at the
top of our lungs.
We had lofty aspirations, until one day we didn't.
I am not someone who believes you can do anything. Many of us
had to come to the realization that we would never run a 4.3 forty
yard dash or we had a voice that was more likely to clear a room than
bring a room to tears. At least not good tears.
At some point life forced us to realize some uncomfortable truths.
The problem most of us share lies within our response to those
truths. For most people, when they realize their childhood dream
may not come to fruition they lower the ceiling of their future
goals and aspirations to increase their probability of attaining
them. Very few will have the athletic prowess or vocal capabilities
to warrant the roar of a crowd, but that does not mean our
aspirations should be of any less magnitude.
"It is better to aim high and miss than aim low and hit."
-Les Brown
We alter the state of our dreams to ensure minimal
disappointment rather than set ourself up for the possibility of
maximal happiness. The result of this strategy is you don't
actually obtain minimal disappointment, but rather just postpone
maximal regret until a point where you no longer have the time or
ability to counteract the damage you have done.
Millions upon millions of people fall victim to selling their peace
everyday. They forgo what they truly love in the name of trying
to be comfortable or to buy material possessions to hide from the
harsh truth that they are distracting themselves from the reality
that they lowered their dreams to the height of what the external
world and society deemed acceptable or "smart".
Peace is not pleasure.
This is a belief I hold and will never let go of.
For so many the misconception that pleasure and peace are
synonymous or one in the same is a fallacy.
You see this everyday with the constant search for the short lived
release of dopamine in our brains. Whether it be in the form of
drugs, alcohol, sex, or how many likes we get on a picture of the
food we got a F#%@!&$ trendy restaurant. #PhoneEatsFirst
The constant pursuit of pleasure distorts and clouds the mind to
believe that moments of temporary elation are what happiness
and peace are supposed to feel like. Look at those who suffer from
addiction. All those people are trying to relive that a moment they
had of ecstasy. Casino's know this too be true and take advantage
of it at every turn. No windows, No clocks. No sense of time or
reality. Flashing lights in every direction, a attractive waiter or
waitress enticing you to have another drink or to "live a little", all
in the pursuit of making you chase your next short lived high.
Focusing on minimizing lows in your life deprive your from ever
truly living. Minimizing risk maximizes regret. This may seem
counterintuitive to the lecture I just gave about gambling
addictions, but stay with me. Calculated risk is different than
simply throwing cash in a machine and hoping you get triple 7's.
I am suggesting you count cards...
Metaphorically of course.
Analyze and approach your life with the understanding that you
will lose. You will win. At times you will fold in order to play the
next hand, and very few times in life you will go all in. Learn
from your mistakes and apply them to your next hand. Life is a
game of probability. The more and more we mitigate risk and
diverge from the path that will bring us peace the more we will
seek empty pleasure to fill the void we create within ourselves.
Life is a gamble. Every moment we breathe is a gamble. We might
as well bet on the thing we love time and time again, than be to
afraid to ever ante up after a bad hand and opt to spend time
mitigating risk by playing penny slots for the rest of our lives.
So what questions do you need to ask yourself in order to
increase your odds of winning your next hand?
What questions have you been avoiding? What self deficiencies
have you been neglecting? What dreams have you gave up on to
this point? Once you have answered these questions, what are
your next steps?
These are the uncomfortable questions that force you to be
honest. As much as it pains us to to ask ourselves these questions
they are the only way forward.
There are two great questions I have discovered that have yet to
steer me wrong in my life that I want to leave you with.
Ask yourself these questions:
1. Would my younger self thank me for the life I have created up to this point?
2. Based on your answer to #1, what would my younger self want me to do next?
God Bless.
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